Gee, let me think about that for a minute...

Questions and suggestions we have been getting about this trip from others:

“Does your wife know about this trip?”

“No alcohol while sailing?” The reply, “That’s right; no alcohol or sex for the duration…” -at that point the conversation usually just ends.

"You need a young fella...and a gun." -thoughtfully considered advice from a cabbie in Toronto.

"I don't think you're gonna sink." -sincere effort at reassurance from a kindergartner.

"What if you run into a whale?" -a different kindergartner expanding my list of worst case scenarios.

"So, have you done much sailing?" -question from someone who clearly doesn't think much of our judgment.

"What do you do if someone falls overboard?" -common question to which I now answer, "Depends on which of us it is."

One of us has a leave of absence agreement that actually contains the clause “If you die”

"Has your wife been supportive of this?" -the only really important question, and another source of worst case scenarios.

"When you get back, will you sell the boat and get a new one?" -from the same guy who asked the previous question, probing the limits of the answer to that question.

"I think that's only about 260 feet too short." -response from my boss, a navy veteran after I said Remedios is 41 feet long.

"I'm glad you're doing this." -the same boss 5 months ago.

"I'm just sick about it." -that same boss today.

"I'm glad you have a life raft." -young boy after we took him to see the movie "Oceans" on Earth Day.

"Have you seen Deadliest Catch?”

Someone told me, in relation to the fact that none of us has sailed across the ocean before “You’d have to go back to BEFORE Christopher Columbus to find three people who know less about sailing across the ocean.”

Via voice mail: “Thanks for the going away party invite, it couldn’t have happened on a worse weekend. But, I’ll see you before you go. At least I think I’ll see you before you go. I’ll make a point of seeing you before you go. I’ll for sure talk to you before you go.”

Thanks, everyone. Pat says that the plans and preparations for the trip are as fun as the trip. Rob and Tom hope not.

How Thick Is Thin? or Can Thin Be Thick? - by Tom

This is a troubling topic, a conundrum, a dilemma, and it got me up at 5:00 AM this Saturday morning. Pat keeps telling Rob and me that he is doing everything he can to keep us all safe on this trip. I hope so, because a couple weeks ago we had to drill a hole in the hull for our ocean poop expeller and drilling a hole was enlightening, to say the least. Rob took one look at the thickness of the hull and announced "I'm sleeping on deck when Tom is steering." Rob and I should talk about the concept of mutually assured destruction from the 1960s  but neither of us has a very clear memory of that era.

Here is a photo of the hole we made and the three smaller holes that fasten the way cool bronze fitting to the hull. Now, this could be a picture of anything, really, so I know you need some relativity and perspective, and I need to hurry up and get in the car and drive to Duluth to work on the boat in cold wind and the blowing snow because our genius captain decided it would be really neat to get the boat out of that heated building it was in and plopped into the ice cold water in the marina in Duluth. More on that later. Are sailboat decks slipperier when wet or with snow? I'll let you know. OK, let's go.

Here are some things that are THICKER than the hull of this sailboat.

 This piece of yummy 12 grain toast is THICKER than the hull of the sailboat, and it tasted better, too.

My Blackberry is THICKER than the hull of this sailboat and has the added value of being an emergency signalling device when we hit a rock and are within 10 miles of a cell tower. 

"Help !!!  We are sinking !"  ----  "What are you sinking about ???"

See it here:  German Coast Guard

The remote for my car is THICKER than the hull of this boat and had the added value of being able to start my car from an airplane as I taxied by the parking ramp last winter in Minneapolis.

Honest.

My wallet is THICKER than the hull of this sailboat and has the added value of being able to buy me a plane ticket home if something goes badly for yours truly on this trip. I could also use it to buy a down jacket when I get to Duluth in a couple hours.

My well-used copy of "Sailing Across the Ocean For Dummies" is THICKER than the hull of this sailboat which is poetic justice or a huge irony, or both.

OK, that's enough for this morning. Maybe I'll post something tomorrow if I still have my fingertips.

People who I stole ideas or words from to write this post:

Pete Steege
Jon Bon Jovi
Rob Courneya
Dave Barry
Sid Hartman

Berlitz