This is a troubling topic, a conundrum, a dilemma, and it got me up at 5:00 AM this Saturday morning. Pat keeps telling Rob and me that he is doing everything he can to keep us all safe on this trip. I hope so, because a couple weeks ago we had to drill a hole in the hull for our ocean poop expeller and drilling a hole was enlightening, to say the least. Rob took one look at the thickness of the hull and announced "I'm sleeping on deck when Tom is steering." Rob and I should talk about the concept of mutually assured destruction from the 1960s but neither of us has a very clear memory of that era.
Here is a photo of the hole we made and the three smaller holes that fasten the way cool bronze fitting to the hull. Now, this could be a picture of anything, really, so I know you need some relativity and perspective, and I need to hurry up and get in the car and drive to Duluth to work on the boat in cold wind and the blowing snow because our genius captain decided it would be really neat to get the boat out of that heated building it was in and plopped into the ice cold water in the marina in Duluth. More on that later. Are sailboat decks slipperier when wet or with snow? I'll let you know. OK, let's go.
Here are some things that are THICKER than the hull of this sailboat.
This piece of yummy 12 grain toast is THICKER than the hull of the sailboat, and it tasted better, too.
My Blackberry is THICKER than the hull of this sailboat and has the added value of being an emergency signalling device when we hit a rock and are within 10 miles of a cell tower. "Help !!! We are sinking !" ---- "What are you sinking about ???"
See it here: German Coast Guard
The remote for my car is THICKER than the hull of this boat and had the added value of being able to start my car from an airplane as I taxied by the parking ramp last winter in Minneapolis. Honest.
My wallet is THICKER than the hull of this sailboat and has the added value of being able to buy me a plane ticket home if something goes badly for yours truly on this trip. I could also use it to buy a down jacket when I get to Duluth in a couple hours.
My well-used copy of "Sailing Across the Ocean For Dummies" is THICKER than the hull of this sailboat which is poetic justice or a huge irony, or both.OK, that's enough for this morning. Maybe I'll post something tomorrow if I still have my fingertips.
People who I stole ideas or words from to write this post:
Pete Steege
Jon Bon Jovi
Rob Courneya
Dave Barry
Sid Hartman
Berlitz
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Wishing for a photo of: "the way cool bronze fitting".
ReplyDeleteThere's really a book out there called, "Sailing Across the Ocean For Dummies?" You mean they actually thought there were enough dummies out there who would try it to make it worth publishing!?
ReplyDelete-Jason :)
Okay...we want to know what part you stole from Jon Bon Jovi?
ReplyDeleteEven though you are not yet ready to say why you're doing this I must ask is it "A Bucket List " kind of thing?
I like the water and even boats, for a couple of hours ...at Cooks Forest River..
Meanwhile back here on dry land, may we link to your blog from our blog about the Utopian Bowls?
Barks,
Tay
Hi folks, Tom here
ReplyDeleteThe way cool bronze fitting, sadly, ceased to be way cool or worthy of a photo once it became part of the ocean poop disposal system.
Books for Dummies seems to be a lose lose proposition to me - Dummies don't hang out in Barnes and Noble, and assuming there is justice in the world, Dummies don't have money to buy books. I made that part about the Dummies book up. That is actually a book about toilets. And, I'll admit to stealing/altering this in advance "There are old sailors, and dumb sailors, but no old dumb sailors."
Bon Jovi's second album was titled "Slippery When Wet"
It was warm and sunny in Duluth and a wonderful weekend to work outdoors. So I retract my comments about the captain including the part about him being a genius.
And yes, Tay, you can link to us. I do plan to take a photo of a nice steaming lunch on a tilted deck being served out of our way cool Utopian dog bowls. We will pass within 100 miles of you on the way east. Maybe when we are done we will know why we did this. WOL
My snout is fine , but boy is Mom's face Red!
ReplyDeleteShe used to be a Bon Jovi fan," back in the day", whatever that means! She can't believe she missed that connection...Recall for Dummies , perhaps?
BOL Tay